Without a Voice



Rebellion can be quiet gestures that have a double meaning.

Too often, the message the child is trying to communicate gets lost. Harsh judgement and words are heaped upon them. What looks like naughtiness is a cry for help.

The drawings given to the abuser with a smile.

The hidden toys and belongings – from small trinkets to school uniforms.

Refusing praise – repeatedly getting in trouble for the same thing you asked them not to do.

Clenched fists and jaw.

Sudden acting out – clinging to you, talking constantly or not at all.

The above aren’t necessarily signs of abuse. Rather a message is being sent “I’m scared” or “I’m confused” and this is the best way I know to protect myself. 

Creating a safe space to make mistakes is just as important as anything else in learning to grow up.




2 thoughts on “Without a Voice

    • Mistakes are how we learn. I used to chat to the checkout guy at the grocery store. A big burly guy who loved action movies and tattoos. One of our conversations really stuck with me.
      I was asking about his youngest child and if they could walk yet. He frowns and his voice comes out indignant, “He’s doing well. He’s still learning.”

      Any time I saw him, he was always defending peoples right to make mistakes and learn at their own pace.

      Liked by 1 person

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